Dating show seating drama: veteran Yang Xueni clashes with rookie Bao Ruanruan, who upends the seating plan and outshines the host.
This dating variety show, 'Meeting, Getting to Know Each Other', was Bilibili's flagship variety project for the second half of the year.
Bilibili self-produced two or three variety shows every year in an attempt to tentatively dip its little jiojio1 into the entertainment industry, but every one of their attempts ended in failure.
Their user base leaned towards ACGN2, otaku culture, and quirky, absurd humour.
Basically, they were simply not the same group as the regular viewers of mainstream variety shows.
So this time, with 'Meeting, Getting to Know Each Other', Bilibili put in a great deal of effort by inviting celebrities with established fan bases from the entertainment industry.
At the same time, they retained the platform's comedic flavour, especially by inviting Bao Ruanruan, a rising 'comedian', along with talk show host Jiang Xu, to appear in the very first episode.
However, as each guest would generate traffic for the platform, arranging seating for a six-person table became the production team's biggest headache.
They only finished drafting the seating plan two days ago.
But, unexpectedly, the moment Bao Ruanruan arrived today, she immediately messed up the whole arrangement.
"Brother Minwen, what do you think?"
Meanwhile, Yang Xue-ni, dressed head to toe in red, walked down the hallway outside the recording studio. A glimmer of amusement crossed her face as she thought of the seating plan.
Of the six invited guests, she had already won more awards on the big screen than Zhou Minwen, who only starred in idol dramas.
Therefore, it was justifiable for her to be seated in the main C position over him.
However, according to the seating plan, Bao Ruanruan was seated above Zhou Minwen, an industry veteran with over a decade of experience. This blatantly violated the basic rules and showed how extremely shameless Bao Ruanruan was!
Yet Yuxin insisted that Bao Ruanruan hadn't intentionally crashed her engagement ceremony!
Yang Xueni scoffed inwardly.
Last time, it was the red carpet; this time, the seating arrangement on a dating show—Bao Ruanruan was clearly doing everything she could to grab attention!
"Shouldn't a rookie know their place?"
Yang Xueni was genuinely burning with anger as she spoke.
"We would never have dared to fight for seats in our first year or two after debut."
As soon as she stepped into the recording studio, she raised her voice.
"Rookies shouldn't always be thinking about grabbing the centre positi..."
But before she could finish her sentence, she stepped into the room and saw the long table in the centre of the recording space—
The two centre seats on either side were still empty.
However, at the third seat from the right, there was a light green thermos.
A pair of slender, snow-white hands were wrapped around it, creating a striking white-and-green contrast and giving off a fresh, delicate vibe.
Yang Xueni's words got stuck in her throat on the spot.
But she quickly raised an eyebrow.
"Brother Minwen, it looks like these rookies don't even come earlier than us anymore."
She clearly didn't know that the ever-present and never-fading green colour was Bao Ruanruan's camouflage.
But Yang Xueni looked seriously at the slender girl sitting with her back to the door.
There was something distinctly unusual about this figure.
Not only was she wearing a modest white dress that covered her arms completely, but she was also sitting with perfect posture.
Her slender shoulders were perfectly level, like a standard horizontal line, with no sign of unevenness.
Her back connected gracefully to her long, snow-pale nape.
The lines of her muscles were straight, with no trace of tilt—they were as upright as the wall behind her.
Her figure and posture were elegant and textbook-perfect.
A name flashed through Yang Xueni's mind—Qu Feifei, the martial artist.
Yang Xueni also thought of her own long-standing issue with being on camera and her tendency to hunch her shoulders.
Some shots of her hunched shoulders were so unflattering that even she was embarrassed to watch them in films.
Although she had hired a fitness coach before, she had no time to train once filming began.
She kept trying to change, but always ended up failing.
So, the more Yang Xueni looked at the girl's silhouette, the more envious she became. Smiling, she walked over to her.
"Your posture is really perfect. Do you have any quick tips or tricks? Can you recommend anything to Big Sis? Big Sis will take you to act with Big Sis next time."
Yang Xueni showed a warm, senior-like smile.
But the slender figure in front of her didn't move.
Instead, her snow-pale nape slowly turned.
In an instant—a delicate, soft, oval-shaped face with gentle, refined features appeared before Yang Xueni.
It felt both unfamiliar and oddly familiar.
The kind of familiarity that made Yang Xueni blush as she recalled the embarrassing moment when she had tripped on the red carpet.
The girl's voice still carried the same soft, delicate tone as on that day when she had gently reminded others not to trip — as if it came with its own fragile BGM.
"Hmm? Were you talking to me?"
Yang Xueni took a step back.
?
!
Bao Ruanruan?
"Are you going to let me act with you, Big Sis?" Bao Ruanruan's eyes were clear and bright as she earnestly repeated the question.
Yang Xueni: "!"
But in the next second, Bao Ruanruan's disappointed gaze slipped gently from Yang Xueni's bold red lips and heavily made-up face down to her shoulders and neck... Her eyes slowly shifted from regret to solemnity.
She sighed and shook her head.
It was as if an old traditional doctor had taken Yang Xueni's pulse and diagnosed her with an incurable disease.
The disease was in its late stages—a hopeless case.
Yang Xue-ni: "???"
You even gave me that look—how is that considered polite?
Bao Ruanruan genuinely felt regret.
She had once wished for a chance to transform a werewolf into a good citizen, and now that chance was right in front of her.
She wanted to treasure that chance.
But she just couldn't do it.
"Sorry, I can't save you."
Yang Xueni: "!"
"You've had uneven shoulders for quite a while now, accompanied by a hunched posture."
Yang Xue-ni's face flushed red in an instant.
The director had only ever told her that in private!
How did Bao Ruanruan know?
And she just blurted it all out like that!
If no one said anything, the audience would probably focus on her face rather than her posture.
But once that secret was exposed, they would start to notice her slouching posture instead!
From then on, every time she appeared on screen, the audience would be distracted from the show she was in!
Yang Xueni flushed red again and tried her best not to glance around to see if any nearby staff had overheard their conversation...
But she had a bad feeling.
It was as if Bao Ruanruan had seized her vital point!
But Bao Ruanruan's expression was one of earnest helplessness as if she truly wished to help but couldn't.
"I don't have any quick fixes either."
Resolving this issue would require muscle training and correcting long-term habits and would take at least six months to a year.
What a pity, werewolf.
How could I possibly save you?
"Do you need a personal trainer's contact details? You can just search online," Bao Ruanruan said, spreading her hands (🤷🏻♀️).
Yang Xueni: "......!"
Yang Xueni tried her best to remain calm. "No, thank you."
She strode over in her seven-centimetre-high, red-soled heels, her steps sounding crisp and clear, and pulled out a chair to sit down.
Just moments ago, she had been upset about the seating arrangement dispute and the rookie's lack of manners, but now, she was too flustered to remember any of it.
She even forgot to greet the show crew in the room and ignored Director Zhong Zeyuan when he came over to say hello and offer her his hand.
As she pulled out the chair, it nearly rolled over Zhong Zeyuan's foot.
Zhong Zeyuan stepped back, his face showing a mixture of emotions.
"Hello, Director."
Zhou Minwen had been in the industry for ten years. He was a man of few words but very astute.
He scanned the room and noted how Yang Xueni had taken the centre seat without hesitation or humility. Then he glanced at the embarrassed young director.
After exchanging brief greetings, he walked over to his seat in the corner.
But a thought flashed through his mind— So when Yang Xueni complained about rookies hogging the centre seat without any humility, who exactly was she talking about?
He had debuted seven years before her.
When he was already a leading man in idol dramas, she was still just a fresh-faced newcomer.
However, he wasn't generating as much buzz as her now.
So, was she mocking him?
Zhou Minwen was known as a nice guy in the industry, but even he didn't look too happy this time.
But when he walked to his seat, he was startled. "Xiao Bao, why are you sitting here? This is my seat."
Bao Ruanruan opened her small mouth slightly.
Fate-chosen seat.
Hers.
"Teacher Zhou, it's mine now."
"Haha." Zhou Minwen had been troubled earlier by Yang Xueni's complete lack of courtesy, but now his mood had lifted. "You silly girl."
You're too considerate.
She arrived early and picked a seat in the corner?
She was so modest, even expressing it through a joke, probably to avoid making him feel old or out of place?
"Teacher Zhou, just scoot over a bit, okay? I really can't move from this seat."
Bao Ruanruan struggled while holding her thermos.
"Then I'll sit across from you, Xiao Bao."
Yang Xueni: "?"
Suddenly, she remembered the drama over the seating arrangement.
Wait, why didn't Bao Ruanruan take her centre seat?
Soon, Qu Feifei also arrived. As soon as she walked in, she kept bowing, her face full of embarrassment.
"Sorry, teachers. My previous schedule ran late, and I just made it here."
She was very respectful.
However, when she looked at the long table and saw that Zhou Minwen had taken her seat, she was stunned.
"Teacher Zhou, can we switch seats?"
"Oh, how could I possibly sit in front of you?"
Zhou Minwen was grinning from ear to ear and refused to budge.
But Qu Feifei didn't dare to sit at the centre — her status in the industry wasn't high, after all. Yet, with one swift move, she reached out and lifted Teacher Zhou right up.
Zhou Minwen: "??"
No wonder she used to be wary of this martial-arts-trained werewolf...
Bao Ruanruan blinked, lowered her little face quietly, and pretended she hadn't seen a thing.
Qu Feifei moved Zhou Minwen to the centre seat, where he and Yang Xueni stared at each other blankly.
Yang Xueni: "!"
So she was the only one who didn't offer her seat to Zhou Minwen??
When she saw Zhou Minwen glance her way, she immediately remembered accusing someone of being a thoughtless rookie…
Yang Xueni was deeply embarrassed.
Her complaint turned out to be a boomerang.
In the end, it came full circle and stabbed her right in the back.
How did it come to this?
Not long after, singer Xiao Qi arrived along with host Jiang Xu. The two took seats at the far left and right ends of the long table.
All six people had now arrived.
Director Zhong Zeyuan gave the signal, and the sound of the clapperboard marked the start of filming.
Host Jiang Xu was responsible for maintaining the show's pace.
After a brief opening speech, the observation room began playing footage of the Love House.
"I wonder what kind of boys and girls have entered the house..."
All six guests turned their heads to watch the television.
Qu Feifei took that opportunity to steal a glance at Bao Ruanruan.
With her sharp senses, Bao Ruanruan noticed immediately and looked back at her.
Caught on the spot, Qu Feifei darted away like a startled little mouse, instantly averting her gaze.
Bao Ruanruan blinked.
It seemed that the life-preserving agreement was absolutely necessary.
This werewolf still had her in his sights.
However, Bao Ruanruan's attention was soon drawn to the TV screen in the room.
Live comments also began to fly across the screen.
[Wow, Xuexue, I'm here! You look stunning in red again today! That red dress looks amazing on you!]
[Feifei is so cute today, too.]
[Eh? Yang Xueni is sitting with Bao Ruanruan? LOL, and Qu Feifei is sitting right across from them? What kind of Shura Field3 is this? Today must be Bao Ruanruan's day of suffering!]
[Honestly speaking, Bao Ruanruan's visuals totally hold up against Yang Xueni's.]
[This reminds me of the Red Rose and the White Moonlight.]
Bao Ruanruan was sitting diagonally opposite Yang Xueni.
One was wearing a red dress with bold makeup, while the other wore a delicate white dress.
They were evenly matched in beauty.
Against the striking red, Bao Ruanruan's white dress made her look even more ethereal, while her light, almost bare makeup exuded a pure, delicate beauty that made people want to protect her.
The audience couldn't take their eyes off her.
Having become accustomed to the alluring femme fatale persona of Yang Xueni, which often graced the big screen, encountering someone like Bao Ruanruan, who rarely appears onscreen... gave everyone a sense of freshness.
In fact, many thought Bao Ruanruan had won this round.
However, as the footage from the Love House began to play, the audience's attention gradually shifted.
The first episode showed the couples' first meeting in the Love House.
That fleeting shyness between strangers—him so handsome, her so lovely—always set hearts aflutter.
"This reminds me of my first love," said host Jiang Xu with a smile as he spoke to the guests, "It's like eating an unripe plum4—that kind of tartness within youthfulness, and after you finish, there's still a trace of sweetness that lingers on the tongue."
"Even after so many years, that sourness remains vividly remembered."
As soon as he said that, everyone at the table lowered their heads.
Xiao Qi was an idol singer.
Zhou Minwen starred in idol dramas as the male lead.
Qu Feifei was a girl group leader.
Yang Xueni was a single socialite and a dazzling femme fatale.
They were all celebrities who were forbidden from dating by their agencies!
Afraid that Jiang Xu would ask them about their personal love lives, they all averted their gazes.
Only Bao Ruanruan lifted her fair little face, maintaining a perfect neck posture.
And just like that, Jiang Xu noticed her. "Xiao Bao, what do you think? Have you ever tasted the sour love of an unripe plum?"
Yang Xueni's lips curled into a faint spectator's smirk when she heard this question.
[Ahh, this is a trap question! Xiao Bao, don't answer!]
[Nice one, Host — he just hit Bao Ruanruan's soft rib5!]
[Is Bao Ruanruan's 'sour and astringent love6' referring to that scandal with the Lu family?]
Fans were worried, and bystanders were excited to eat melons7.
Meanwhile, her rival was ready to gloat over her misfortune.
However, Bao Ruanruan's following sentence blew all these comments to dust.
With her creamy, porcelain-like face full of seriousness, Bao Ruanruan shook her head solemnly.
She raised one slender, milky-white finger towards Jiang Xu.
"Teacher Jiang, unripe plums shouldn't be eaten."
[?]
Jiang Xu was dumbfounded.
Bao Ruanruan lifted her chin.
"I personally don't eat unripe plums, nor do I like them. Because they contain high levels of oxalic acid and benzoic acid, which are difficult for the human body to absorb. Even metabolism can't neutralise their acidity."
[I'm totally baffled.]
[Gradually forgetting what the Host even asked…]
[Hahaha, Ruanruan, it's that familiar vibe again. Mama is relieved~]
[Host, you haven't seen Xiao Bao's power yet — wait for three seconds... oh, now you have.]
Host Jiang Xu was completely frozen.
Did he just seriously ask whether plums were edible?
Yang Xueni, who had been preparing to laugh, was also rendered speechless.
Jiang Xu cleared his throat, "…That's not what I meant."
"Mm, that's good. Otherwise, we'd be misleading a lot of elderly people and children watching at home~"
Bao Ruanruan immediately let out a sigh of relief.
Jiang Xu: "?"
'Misleading the public' — that is a big hat got slammed onto my head8!
It feels like I'm about to get edited out of the final cut!
"…So, sour, unripe fruits really can't be eaten?" Zhou Minwen seemed a bit interested.
He wasn't fussy about food.
He could handle both sour and sweet.
Jiang Xu: "???"
So we're not getting back on track, huh? This topic's really gone rogue, huh?
Bao Ruanruan blinked before answering, "Some fruits are fine, but the plums that Brother Jiang likes to eat aren't. After he eats them, even his poo becomes acidic. That's really bad for the body."
[Pfft pfft pfft!]
[Now it's getting interesting!]
[Holy crap, Bao Ruanruan's response-ability is strong! She KO'd that tricky question and even counterattacked the Host — beautiful move!]
[What response-ability… this is just her natural self.]
[?]
Jiang Xu's scalp tingled9, and his toes curled so hard that they dug into the floor10.
His poop really wasn't like that…
Wait a minute! How did this topic get so out of hand?
Was it too late for him... to change the subject by saying that the guests in the Love House were as sweet as ripe peaches?
"Let's continue watching how the boys and girls in the Love House interact."
Jiang Xu chose destruction.
He straight-up k!lled the topic and turned to the TV.
[Hahahaha!]
[10 minutes in: Bao Ruanruan scores first blood!]
Footnotes Full List
- 伸出试探的jiojio (shēnchū shìtàn de jiojio: tentatively dip its little foot) = Metaphor/idiom for testing the waters or cautiously exploring a new field. Jiojio: Internet slang (a cute mispronunciation of 脚脚 /jiao/ meaning 'little foot') implying testing the waters cautiously in a playful tone.)
- Anime, Comics, Games and Novels
- 修罗场 (xiūluóchǎng): Lit. 'Shura Field' – borrowed from Buddhist mythology and anime/game slang, meaning a dramatic, emotionally intense, often hostile confrontation.
- 吃到了没熟的梅子 (chī dào le méi shú de méizǐ): "Like eating an unripe plum" – a literary metaphor for bittersweet young love: awkward, sour, yet unforgettable.
- 软肋 (ruǎnlèi): Literally "soft rib" – idiom for a vulnerable point or weakness, often emotional.
- 酸涩恋爱 (suānsè liànài): 'Sour and astringent love' — a metaphor for an awkward, painful or immature romantic experience, often a first love.
- 吃瓜 (chī guā): Literally 'eating melon'; internet slang for watching drama as a spectator, like eating popcorn.
- 一大顶帽子扣下来 (yīdà dǐng màozi kòuxiàlái): Idiom — literally '*a big hat got slammed onto his head'; metaphor meaning being wrongfully blamed or accused.
- 头皮发麻 (tóupífāmá): Literally "scalp tingling" — feeling awkward, panicked, or embarrassed.
- 脚趾抠地 (jiǎozhǐ kōu dì): Slang — 'toes curling so hard they're digging into the ground', extreme secondhand embarrassment.
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