MMIH Chapter 28 : If It's Not High, It's Not Hip (3)

It was so quiet in the room...Xin Mei felt that she could clearly hear all the blood rushing to her brain.

The so-called to be really ashamed to see people, probably was this kind of feeling, right? She covered her face with her hand and squatted down while groping the bed, trying to uncover the baseboard and drilled herself under it.

Footsteps suddenly could be heard behind her. Xin Mei’s small heart began to jump wildly again—should she open her eyes? Or not? This was such a difficult problem.

The scattered picture album papers were picked up one by one, then being put together and left laying flat on the table.

She hesitated for a long time before she finally spread open her five fingers and peeped through them. Lu Qianqiao was picking up all the papers on the floor silently, and laid them on the table like both of them were unaffected. His voice was also very calm as he said, “...the night is already deep, so I'll be going.”

...he, how could he be so calm?! He made it seem that her attempt to drill herself to the bottom of the bed was an extremely foolish idea!

Xin Mei quickly stood up from the floor and pretended to pick up the paper from under the bed. She then went over to him secretly, and gave out a dark cough, “Then, you can leave. I won’t be sending you out...”

As she expected, he did turn and walked away. Though, his pace was a little frantic, that he bumped onto the door. The usually sturdy wooden door fell to the ground with a bang, as wave after wave of the lingering sound echoed through Xinxie Manor that late night.

At last, the senior brothers who were sleeping in the back courtyard had constantly been woken up by the loud noises, could not bear the ill-treatment anymore. They straightened up their voices and shouted, “It’s already midnight! Can you two stop fooling around?! Why don’t you two just stay in bed like obedient babies and stop acting like newly married couples for one night??!”

Lu Qianqiao did not look back at Xin Mei. He pulled up the fallen door panel in an instant and stood there wondering what to do with it. This noob translation was translated by a noob translator きつね. Please read this chapter at

Xin Mei’s sharp eyes could clearly see that his ears were turning red little by little, and his shoulders seemed to be shaking slightly.

Poor guy...was he embarrassed enough to cry?

Hmm, if he was calm and collected, she would be the one in distress. But when he was embarrassed, she was the one who calmed down instead.

What an inhuman vice...

Xin Mei cleared her throat and said, “Just put it aside. Don’t worry about it.”

He put aside the door panel as he was trembling. He turned his face away as if he was going to hide his face and ran away. She quickly said, “That...Lu Qianqiao, actually...actually, there’s nothing to it. It's just something, no need to be nervous.”

He froze in place and refused to turn back.

She thought for a moment. “How about, you come in again? Let’s talk about important things like our marriage and childbearing plans or something...“

He let out a helpless sigh, then slowly turned himself around, and quietly stared at her with a kind of eyes that she couldn’t understand.

“Xin Mei,” he reluctantly said, “you...we can’t do it yet...anyhow...”

Hmm, his neck even turned red...was it because he knocked over the wooden door or because he saw the ‘Orchid And Musk, Lovely Pistil Collection’? As a matter of fact, he had shirk away from doing bridal chamber and ornamented candles at least three or four times, even to the point of tying her up with his bewitching rope. Was it because...because—he actually didn’t understand any of this, and was too embarrassed to say it?!

Xin Mei suddenly realised what had happened, as the expression in her eyes in an instant turned soft and took pity on him.

This poor child, although he had a mother, it was almost the same as having none. Surely no one taught him these things, right? No wonder ah, no wonder...

She picked up the ‘Orchid And Musk, Lovely Pistil Collection’ and gently walked over to him. Then, she put it gently in his stiff palm and continued to say to him softly, “Lu Qianqao, you don’t need to be afraid. These...take it and look at it slowly while you’re alone, and you’ll soon understand. Remember, you must look at it when you are alone.”

...what the hell.

Lu Qianqiao resisted the urge to throw out the picture album and tore it to pieces, as he stiffly threw it back to her, “No.”

“Yes.” She gently shoved it back again at him, “You, you need to learn it at once...”

Since he was forced to hold the picture album, his fingers started to tighten around it instantly. The poor ‘Orchid And Musk, Lovely Pistil Collection’ gave out an anguished groan, as its hardcover papers broke into small pieces.

Lu Qianqiao fixed his gaze at her as he asked with a hoarse voice, "What should I learn? Say that again."

Xin Mei smiled at him kindly, “You haven’t learned it, have you? Look at this picture album and learn how husband and wife get along together.“

The remnants of ‘Orchid And Musk, Lovely Pistil Collection’ were suddenly thrown to the ground. He stared at her for a long time, before he suddenly revealed a strange smile. That smile was full of death aura, just what, she didn’t know how to say it, but it was somewhat dangerous, that she subconsciously took a step back. This noob translation was translated by a noob translator きつね. Please read this chapter at

“Yes, I haven’t.” He whispered, “Are you going to teach me?”

What? What?! Teach him?!

Xin Mei repeatedly shook her hands, “Neither do I... “

“Come here.”

One of his hands grabbed her.

This time, it was not something that he only mentioned playfully, nor was it blackmail, but a real other words, it was more appropriate to say that she was being clamped down. His strength was so unrestrained that Xin Mei felt that her ribs were breaking open, that she couldn’t help screaming in pain. At the next moment, her lips were covered with two warm dry lips.

The radiance of the full moon seemed to fall in front of her eyes, a burst of brilliant white. However, Xin Mei suspected that it was caused by suffocation, the result of being hugged too tightly. She snorted painfully as she pushed his chest with her two hands.

He still didn’t let her go...if he didn’t let her go, she would suffocate and foam would come out from her mouth!

His lips moved away just in time. She gasped for breath as she complained intermittently, “I...almost choked to death...“

Her whole body was hoisted up around her waist as Xin Mei rushed to hold his neck. Then, her lips were firmly blocked again. This time, his lips were no longer dry, but rather hot and moist. He caressed her lips with great details.

The brilliant white colour reappeared in front of her eyes. She subconsciously held her breath and tried to hide but at the same time, she was reluctant to. She could not tell whether she was feeling happy or miserable.

His entangled lips moved slightly away, and his voice sounded husky with a bit of gasp, “Can’t you breathe in through your nose?”

It turned turned out that one could breathe through one’s nose!

Unwilling to be outdone, she bowed her head and kissed him again——now she could do it too! Who feared who?

As the kiss deepened and became much heavier, the two people breathing didn’t ease even a bit and became much more rapid. Their lips were moist, but their breath was as hot and dry as the desert wind. Unwilling to just caress between their lips, Lu Qianqao opened his lips and tentatively held her soft upper lip, licking and sucking.

It was a strange and elusive feeling, like a rope, that held her tight in circles. Xin Mei could not help biting him back, on the nose, gently.

At the next moment, she was bitten on the lip by him, like a sense of punishment.

“ your mouth and don’t bite.”

“You also bite...!”

Her faint protest was swallowed back, as more ferocious kisses hit her and so did his tongue.

She didn’t even think of biting him anymore. Her whole body had turned into a piece of sugar, which was soaked in the warm water, and was about to melt.

It turned out that this was what people called a kiss. In addition to eating and talking, lips could also be used to gently caress one’s beloved.

Xin Mei learned very fast. She was never willing to be passive. She soon followed suit and danced with him with the tip of her tongue. She couldn’t help herself from getting more involved.

She felt that this was not enough. She wished for something more. She held his head still and kissed him deeper.

Lu Qianqiao’s throat let out a deep moan, and his wet lips suddenly left. Immediately afterwards, it nestled by the side of her head. It settled on her delicate ear and he kissed along its delicate shape. Finally, his lips landed on the hollow part of her collarbone, and with the tip of his tongue, he licked the spot meticulously.

Ticklish! But it was not really that ticklish.

Xin Mei went soft and she asked him while she was still feeling a deep desire, “...not going to bed?”

He was still full of desire but her words felt like his heart had been dosed by cold water.

What is he doing now? Don’t stop at this moment! Not yet!

He was breathing hard on her chest, unable to speak, and could only shake his head.

“Then...then you bring over that picture album. We can learn and do it at the same the way, that picture 'Guanyin sitting on a lotus' just now is a pretty good start...” This noob translation was translated by a noob translator きつね. Please read this chapter at

He smiled wryly, “Are you going to teach me again?”

Her chin rested on his forehead, and she stretched out her hand to grope for his shirt. “Let’s take it to step by step...first, let me take off your coat...”

Her fingers were as nimble as snakes, slipping through the seams of his shirt and started to touch his bare chest.

The man in her arms was shocked all over as if he had been pricked by thorns. He raised his hand and pushed her away, and Xin Mei felt a flash of gold appear before his eyes—well, well, if it wasn’t her old friend, the bewitching rope. They had met once again.

This time he tied her so firmly that even his arms were also tied along with her. He picked her up and threw her on the bed, covering her with a quilt.

“Lu Qianqiao!” Xin Mei's muffled cry came from inside the quilts, “You, you have the nerve to tie me twice in one night!”

He heaved a long sigh of relief. He was aware that his chest was currently overflowing with desire like his heart would jump out.

He smiled bitterly as he stretched out his hand and tried to comfort Xin Mei who was wrapped in the quilt like a meat worm with a few pats, but he was somewhat timid. After hesitating for a long time, he had to whisper his words, “Xin Mei, it was me who can’t restrain myself...for that, I’m really sorry. So, please wait for a few minutes...”

What the hell was he struggling with? She was unable to completely understand!

Lu Qianqiao went to the door and picked up the ‘Orchid And Musk, Lovely Pistil Collection’. He thought about it and then put it in his sleeve.

“...I took the picture album. Save the rest for another time.”

The fallen door panel was draped over the empty door opening. As soon as he waved, the bewitching rope became loose and returned to him in the blink of an eye.

Xin Mei tried frantically to jump down from the bed and ran after the door, however, she could not even see a trace of him anymore.

With her anger that flared from the bottom of her heart mixed with her unfinished desire, she smashed the poor door panel into slag with just one punch.

“Lu Qianqiao! You coward!”

The man who lit the fire and didn’t extinguish it was the most annoying man in the world.

The author has something to say: Meat, meat, meat! Who said that there was no meat?

Noob Translator's Musing

Don't ask me what the author meant, because I really don't know.


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16 Jul 24
🦊 : I've updated 2 new chapters for ROHYX on my Ko-fi page: Chapters 527 & 528. Those who have sponsored me some teas, you have 30 days of access to all the chapters available there. 😊